El-No: Bomb-ba-bomb-ba-bomb-bomb-bombs

I blame ABC.

With each Bachelorette episode, Ashley’s clothes become worse and worse. Someone get that girl a stylist. She is just one jort/ bikini combo away from being Kelly Kapowski on Saved By The Bell.

Bathing suits belong at the beach or the pool, not at a cocktail party (or a city street).

With Ashley serving as a poor swimsuit example, I can see how Miss El-No got confused.

The bikini, a two-piece bathing suit invented in the Fifties, was named after the Bikini Islands (a weapons testing location). Hey Miss El-No, cover up your bombs! The next time you decide to prance down the street in a bikini, please do so with a little more class. 

You need a coverup. These are my favorites:

Splurge: Calypso St. Barth Bengal Printed Caftan for $225

Classic: Burberry Brit Empire Waist Check Coverup for $175 (I want it!)

Hip: Marc by Marc Jacobs Simone Stripe Bandeau Coverup for $121

Steal: Calypso St. Barth for Target Print Dress in Turquoise for $36.99